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The Twelve Days of Python

One of my less pleasant pass-times is butchering the English language with dodgy verse. I already have a track record wrangling well known poems for friends or re-hashing libretto for vocal performance.

Last week, in the #python-uk IRC channel, there was discussion of what a Pythonic Christmas carol would look like.

Today, given that it's the season of peace and goodwill to all men (and women), I've decided to ignore that sentiment and publish what is, perhaps, my most diabolical creation yet. I give you, "The Twelve Days of Python" (sung to the tune of... well, I'm sure you can figure it out):

On the first day of Christmas, Guido sent to me..
some code in a Git repos'try.

On the second day of Christmas, Guido sent to me...
two pull requests for my code in the Git repos'try.

On the third day of Christmas, Guido sent to me...
three bug reports, two pull requests for my code in the Git repos'try.

On the fourth day of Christmas, Guido sent to me...
four failing tests, three bug reports, two pull requests for my code in the Git repos'try.

On the fifth day of Christmas, Guido sent to me...
five network pings!
Four failing tests, three bug reports, two pull requests for my code in the Git repos'try.

On the sixth day of Christmas, Guido sent to me...
Six functions calling,
Five network pings!
Four failing tests, three bug reports, two pull requests for my code in the Git repos'try.

On the seventh day of Christmas, Guido sent to me...
Seven ifs-or-elsing, six functions calling,
Five network pings!
Four failing tests, three bug reports, two pull requests for my code in the Git repos'try.

On the eighth day of Christmas, Guido sent to me...
Eight scripts-a-parsing, seven ifs-or-elsing, six functions calling,
Five network pings!
Four failing tests, three bug reports, two pull requests for my code in the Git repos'try.

On the ninth day of Christmas, Guido sent to me...
Nine JITs compiling, eight scripts-a-parsing, seven ifs-or-elsing, six functions calling,
Five network pings!
Four failing tests, three bug reports, two pull requests for my code in the Git repos'try.

On the tenth day of Christmas, Guido sent to me...
Ten templates rend'ring, nine JITs compiling, eight scripts-a-parsing, seven ifs-or-elsing, six functions calling,
Five network pings!
Four failing tests, three bug reports, two pull requests for my code in the Git repos'try.

On the eleventh day of Christmas, Guido sent to me...
Eleven exceptions raising, ten templates rend'ring, nine JITs compiling, eight scripts-a-parsing, seven ifs-or-elsing, six functions calling,
Five network pings!
Four failing tests, three bug reports, two pull requests for my code in the Git repos'try.

On the twelfth day of Christmas, Guido sent to me...
Twelve lists comp'rending, eleven exceptions raising, ten templates rend'ring, nine JITs compiling, eight scripts-a-parsing, seven ifs-or-elsing, six functions calling,
Five network pings!
Four failing tests, three bug reports, two pull requests for my code in the Git repos'try.

Some of the lines I discarded were, "X metaclasses confusing", "X classes inher'ting", "X breakpoints breaking" and "X objects instant'ing". However, even I have standards for writing poetry...

:-)